Another year to become stronger.

Okay, guess what... I am going to have a 6-year singlehood. I have to admit that I am very surprised at myself.
Back to 2011, I got myself a first boyfriend then freed myself off a toxic relationship at the same time. I was dumb and childish to try to be in a relationship with a person that I didn't even love. However, I really didn't cut the string between us because I thought there would be no one to love me stupidly and wholeheartedly. Sooner or later, I found out he was a dick yet a nuisance, I shut down and blocked him forever from my personal life, I even told my friend to say to his fucking face to back off. That happened when I was still a secondary student in Singapore.
I moved to study in  the USA on 2012 and fell head over heels for a guy (for fucking damn long) but I was unable to confess to him on how much I loved and wanted to cherish him, I couldn't do so, due to my family problem that I wished no one to drag down by me, then I let him float away.
From 2012 until now, I got no boyfriend because I was busily taking care of my own family, dealing with debts, making sure everybody was healthy and full, etc. Of course that deeply inside of my heart, I wished to get a boyfriend, a person whose shoulder that I could lean on but... according to my personal situation, it seemed very impossible to happen. There did have some times I wanted to give up on love, I didn't believe that I would be loved because I always thought I wasn't pretty enough since my face always looked dull, and I didn't dress up enough, I was never enough. However, around in the last half of 2016, I met some new friends made me believe that I was beautiful and the strangers complimented on my look. Slowly, I gained confidence and put more faith on me. If someone didn't love or put any effort to know me, then that person surely didn't deserve my love at all. He would never ever be with me so I walked away from the hopelessness, wiped my tears off to move forward, and never turned back.
Honestly, I am not sure on how long I would stay single, but oh well, it doesn't bother me that bad so... I think I can handle this :)) do not look down on me because one more year of singlehood wouldn't hurt a bee, would it?